We’re living and dying with regret
Most people end their life with regrets. When palliative nurse Bronnie Ware asked her dying patients what they regretted most about their lives, again and again she heard, ““I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.”
Pillemer and his team who interviewed 1,500 people over 65 about what haunts them most about their life choices told Today.com. Often people regret time wasted over petty grudges, unforgiveness and making unwise decisions about relationships.
Believing we need certainty triggers anxiety and exhaustion
An all or nothing, black or white, good or bad mindset in making decisions paralyzes us. It leads to anxiety, panic flight-or-fight mode contemplating what might happen. Overthinking the possibilities leads to exhaustion and ultimately betrays trust with ourselves that’s needed to make other necessary decisions.
Kids are suffering when parents pressure their child to live their unfilled dreams.
When faced with their own unfulfilled ambitions, parents who see their child as part of themselves want their child to fulfill their unfulfilled ambitions. This study suggests that parents may desire their child to redeem their broken dreams. Children under this pressure can find it difficult to cope under high expectations.While some children may give up on their own dreams and talents, others might act defensive resulting in breakdown in relationships, low self-esteem, sometimes depression and self-harm.
Brummelman E, Thomaes S, Slagt M, Overbeek G, de Castro BO, Bushman BJ (2013) My Child Redeems My Broken Dreams: On Parents Transferring Their Unfulfilled Ambitions onto Their Child. PLoS ONE 8(6): e65360. https://doi.org/10.1371/journal.pone.0065360